insecurities are never cute

she used to walk with so much swagger
but it came crashing down like nine hundred and eleven towers
her song was wrapped in good times like Wilona with a hot date
but her life resembled Good Times
she was Millicent Gordon Woods
she pretended to be perfect

but her perfection was cloaked in lies

her soul remained hidden behind 2 for 1 knock off shades

like a victim of domestic violence

her mantra was "its all good"

but this wasnt 1994

so she

let his movement eat at her soul

his words continued to chip at her existance until she was no longer the she that she wanted to show the world

she was a frail comparison of her former self

and even when she tried to stand tall

the winds of heartache would blow her down

and the pressures of stress would bend her over

leaving her to question the reality of who she had become

there was a time when she would shun the world

allow disrespectful diatribes to dance around her like dandelions in a summer field

but now

even strangers can call out from car windows

and their crass comments will devour the very essence of her heart

so in the mirror she stands

looking through who she has become

wondering in her heart where she went wrong

trying to pin pieces of her pride back to her character

just so she can shield her self loathing

she tries to cover her scars with make up

but even the good bottle of foundation can not cover her cracked foundation

she wants to move on

and place her past in packages to be left on the curb

but somehow

before the thursday morning pickup she finds her self rummaging through where she used to be

and using those old wounds to build upon

yeah

she says its all good

but the reality is

her reality is

flawed

she paints on the face of a warrior

then the face of a queen

then the face diva

- which by definition is not the female version of a hustler

then the face of "ms. i.n.d.e.p.e.n.d.e.n.t.-i can do bad by my damn self"

then the face of sunday morning service

and without taking a second look

she screams love me for me

but even she

doesnt love she

for she

is just a face

of all of her insecurities

(quiet da artist/copyright 2009)