she loves me not
or at least that is what the rose pedals said
as i
peeled them away from the stem
wishing for one more
moment
i couldnt explain what this was
but it wasnt what it was supposed to be
i hated the things about her that i was supposed to love
and loved
nothing
but we
couldnt stop being we
sold separation to society
only when it was convenient
and were only together for the facebook post and instagram selfies
she loves me not
or at least that is what the social media said
her thoughts posted for the world
leaving me to dig through her subliminal swan song
i didnt know if we were
coming or going
laughing or crying
living or dying
and i
was all out of moments
no more rose pedals
to determine the fate of her heart
she loves me not
and i cant untie this knot
or undo this love
or understand the complications of this heartache
or explain this heartbreak
other than just saying
that
love
is not complicated
but this
this is rocket science
and chinese arithmetic
and how the internet works
this is explaining god to an atheist
or sunset to a blind man
or "fullfillingness' first finale" to someone who had never heard "music of my mind"
this is us
and we
are living out the extinction of our own possibility in purgatory
somewhere between
complete
and
corrosion
its complica...
its us
(paul wrote it/copyright 2014)
